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ajremixGot to the fighting proper in re-watching the Enis Lobby arc when THIS little gem struck me. I'm caught between wanting it unstruck and wondering just how much things would have changed.
Title: The Not-Better Alternative
Fandom: One Piece
Rating: PG for the occasional foul language
Word Count: 666
Characters: Zoro, Kaku, Jyabura, Usopp and a dash of Sanji
Summary: The way the Devil Fruit assignments could have (and thankfully didn’t) gone.
The last of the leg-slashing things was finally deflected away. Zoro had been beginning to feel the slightest hint of muscles burning to keep up with the pace, lips pulled back into a snarl as his opponent stood on the uneven slabs of what was left of the floor. That damned bastard was still laughing! “Are you trying to make fun of me?”
“No, no. I’m very much impressed,” the CP9 agent said with a big, amiable smile. “But since you are in a hurry, I would like to show you my new ability.” That smile turned decidedly not-amiable. “You see, you’re not the only one that has gotten stronger since Galley-La.”
All Zoro could do was watch with his jaw against his sternum.
~*~*~*~
Jyabura smiled his big, wolfy smile at the little sniper. He had hoped for one of the stronger looking pirates (like the swordsman or Straw Hat himself) but he supposed he could make due with what he had (at least it wasn’t the woman- what kind of enjoyment would he get with killing her?). Besides, the masked guy had the balls to shoot the WG flag, who knew what else the scrawny thing had in him?
The sniper grasped his weapon of choice tightly (his arms didn’t look much thicker than Jyabura’s wrists- pre-zoan form) and stood his ground as best his quaking legs could. Well, if nothing else he got extra ballsy points for that, the wolf-assassin figured. “Oh? Are we up for a fight?”
“Sh-Shut up! I came to rescue Robin! I’m ready for any- ah, the ceiling’s falling in.”
Jyabura looked up with an ‘ah?’ just in time for a little bit of wood to bop him in the nose. And then the world fell down in a mess of wood and plaster and- of all things –suds.
“Oh dear. I might have been a little too enthusiastic with my earlier attacks…”
“Dammit, Kaku! Watch what the hell yer doing!”
With his naked blades twirling idly in his hands, Kaku smiled from what was left of the floor above with absolutely no warmth. “Why Jyabura, I apologize. I didn’t realize you were down there.”
“Bullshit! My garden’s ALWAYS been bellow that crappy study of yours!”
“Zoro? Zoro! Hang on,” grunting and heaving his way over, the sniper pulled a green-headed body out from the rubble. “A-Are you hurt? Are you okay?”
“’M fine,” he gasped, “but I… I can’t seem to move. These damn suds just… sapped my strength!”
Visible, even from under his mask, the smaller man paled. “Craaaaaap.”
“You and your worthless stupid ability,” Jyabura ranted, shifting back to human form where he’d be less likely to step in a pile of bubbles. “I’ve never seen a dumber skill in my life!”
“I’m sure I could find proper uses,” that cold smile, somehow, proceeded to get even colder. “Perhaps it would actually get you to bathe once in a while.”
“You’re an utter waste to CP9 with this! The most useless, pointless, undignified-” Jyabura then dutifully slid to his knees where bubbles had somehow managed to cling up around his ankles. And, once he was on the ground, the bubbles then began stuffing themselves in the flailing man’s mouth.
Personally, Kaku had no idea how he managed through life without this power.
~*~*~*~
Sanji sat. And he starred. And his cigarette had long since fallen out of his mouth and put itself out in his half-filled cup of tea. He wasn’t exactly sure how it happened, but one minute he was sitting across the table from a beautiful woman (not as beautiful as Nami-san or Robin-chan but beautiful in her own ‘I’m going to stomp your balls and feed you your own teeth and have a pleasant time doing so’ kind of way). Then, all of the sudden, he was in the presence of a giraffe with glass precariously balanced on its muzzle.
“I,” he told the giraffe at length, “don’t even know what to think.”
Title: The Not-Better Alternative
Fandom: One Piece
Rating: PG for the occasional foul language
Word Count: 666
Characters: Zoro, Kaku, Jyabura, Usopp and a dash of Sanji
Summary: The way the Devil Fruit assignments could have (and thankfully didn’t) gone.
The last of the leg-slashing things was finally deflected away. Zoro had been beginning to feel the slightest hint of muscles burning to keep up with the pace, lips pulled back into a snarl as his opponent stood on the uneven slabs of what was left of the floor. That damned bastard was still laughing! “Are you trying to make fun of me?”
“No, no. I’m very much impressed,” the CP9 agent said with a big, amiable smile. “But since you are in a hurry, I would like to show you my new ability.” That smile turned decidedly not-amiable. “You see, you’re not the only one that has gotten stronger since Galley-La.”
All Zoro could do was watch with his jaw against his sternum.
~*~*~*~
Jyabura smiled his big, wolfy smile at the little sniper. He had hoped for one of the stronger looking pirates (like the swordsman or Straw Hat himself) but he supposed he could make due with what he had (at least it wasn’t the woman- what kind of enjoyment would he get with killing her?). Besides, the masked guy had the balls to shoot the WG flag, who knew what else the scrawny thing had in him?
The sniper grasped his weapon of choice tightly (his arms didn’t look much thicker than Jyabura’s wrists- pre-zoan form) and stood his ground as best his quaking legs could. Well, if nothing else he got extra ballsy points for that, the wolf-assassin figured. “Oh? Are we up for a fight?”
“Sh-Shut up! I came to rescue Robin! I’m ready for any- ah, the ceiling’s falling in.”
Jyabura looked up with an ‘ah?’ just in time for a little bit of wood to bop him in the nose. And then the world fell down in a mess of wood and plaster and- of all things –suds.
“Oh dear. I might have been a little too enthusiastic with my earlier attacks…”
“Dammit, Kaku! Watch what the hell yer doing!”
With his naked blades twirling idly in his hands, Kaku smiled from what was left of the floor above with absolutely no warmth. “Why Jyabura, I apologize. I didn’t realize you were down there.”
“Bullshit! My garden’s ALWAYS been bellow that crappy study of yours!”
“Zoro? Zoro! Hang on,” grunting and heaving his way over, the sniper pulled a green-headed body out from the rubble. “A-Are you hurt? Are you okay?”
“’M fine,” he gasped, “but I… I can’t seem to move. These damn suds just… sapped my strength!”
Visible, even from under his mask, the smaller man paled. “Craaaaaap.”
“You and your worthless stupid ability,” Jyabura ranted, shifting back to human form where he’d be less likely to step in a pile of bubbles. “I’ve never seen a dumber skill in my life!”
“I’m sure I could find proper uses,” that cold smile, somehow, proceeded to get even colder. “Perhaps it would actually get you to bathe once in a while.”
“You’re an utter waste to CP9 with this! The most useless, pointless, undignified-” Jyabura then dutifully slid to his knees where bubbles had somehow managed to cling up around his ankles. And, once he was on the ground, the bubbles then began stuffing themselves in the flailing man’s mouth.
Personally, Kaku had no idea how he managed through life without this power.
~*~*~*~
Sanji sat. And he starred. And his cigarette had long since fallen out of his mouth and put itself out in his half-filled cup of tea. He wasn’t exactly sure how it happened, but one minute he was sitting across the table from a beautiful woman (not as beautiful as Nami-san or Robin-chan but beautiful in her own ‘I’m going to stomp your balls and feed you your own teeth and have a pleasant time doing so’ kind of way). Then, all of the sudden, he was in the presence of a giraffe with glass precariously balanced on its muzzle.
“I,” he told the giraffe at length, “don’t even know what to think.”
